10 April 2007

见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话


几年前,看到张清芳清谈节目的一个访谈,嘉宾是康康。里头康康有提到他是如何从众多的主持人中脱颖而出。记得当时康康大概这么说过:

“我自知长得其貌不扬,所以必须另辟生路。就这样,我在家里潜心专研说话的技巧。首先,我将人分为各种类型,再根据各类型想好应该怎么沟通,应该说那些话。然后,我就去实践。不管在什么样的场合,第一件事就是将每一个人的类型分清楚,再跟着想好的说话方式与之沟通。日复日,从失败中慢慢累计经验就能贯通使用了。”

康康就是以这种“见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话”的说话技巧而赢得大众的认可。虽然说“见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话”带有贬义,但我们却无可否认它的逻辑性。我们总不能见鬼佬讲华语吧?

生活在现实的社会里就得遵从现实的规律。有自我个性固然是良好情操,但如能圆滑应对而减少误会摩擦蛮非美事?只要心术正,目的善良,“见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话”其实也并不那么坏嘛。

24 comments:

1046 said...

我觉得他说话是“自我贬质式”的。不好练。

wk said...

能“见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话。”是自谦,并不是个个都有酱的本事。

湘绣蜻蜓 said...

是啊,很多时候要看怎样的人,再想要以什么样的方式开口。
要“鸟”人,也必须酱。

夏娃 said...

好听就叫圆滑,难听就叫两头蛇>︿<

Mee Ling said...

如果說是按照對方的情況與程度,說一些讓對方可以明白的話;這與人話與鬼話有不同嗎?

风渐凉 said...

嗯,人心隔肚皮,如果事事坦率事事直言,吃亏的终究是自己,故我也认为,有时候,欲在这社会中混得开,面具是免不了的。

凡奇 Frankie said...

1046,
自古能自嘲者皆为智者。当然难练。大家加油吧!

wk,
我看第一要做到的是先降低自己的身份。

湘绣蜻蜓,
现实就是这样,我想只要目的是善良的,这种做法可是要多加学习。

夏娃,
我认为“两头蛇”的意思是指没有立场只为了奉承的人。

“圆滑”却是一种双赢的做事与说话技巧。

Mee Ling,
你说了重点,这就是善说话的精髓。

~风_渐凉~,
想不到你年纪轻轻竟然明白个中道理。我在21岁的时候,可是个很方的人(很多角,不够圆)。哈哈。

said...

于是,我说人话来了。。。哈哈。。。

少俊 said...

这篇写的不错.其实这个年代很多东西被"灰色带"化,就是没有所谓的黑与白.这年代重感觉.

jiaehian said...

在现在的社会的确需要具备这样的一种能力

你才能够生存的比较好

爱睡觉的猪 said...

其实要看情况和阶段吧。十几岁的时侯当然可以有话直说,人家会说你“年轻人敢怒敢言”,真性情。但当已经踏入社会,就要知道其中的游戏规则,不然吃亏的还是自己。

凡奇 Frankie said...

杂,
喂,打杂的,你不给有鬼来看我的部落?哈哈。。。

少俊,
说得也对,人鬼其实也很难分。。。真头痛!

jiaehian,
我就是少了这方面,所以很容易得罪人。大家共勉吧!

爱睡觉的猪,
童言无忌!真怀念童年时光。。。但它离我太远了。。。呜呜。

CacA*yEw* said...

说话技巧,以及交际手法都是我们大家学着的
没错,面对不同的人,用不同的说话技巧,
但当我们在与人首次交谈,
那我们如何是好?
要谈些什么话题?
所以,
还在学习当中

火鳥 said...

认同光明之窗見解。做人圓滑歉卑兼心术正最难能可貴,太有性格兼我行我素令人难以靠近,有時反而会吃虧。

這與两頭蛇、沒主見、沒原則完全两回事,圓滑和狡猾根本两码子戲,有些面具戴起來是想害人,有些面具戴起來是為了不想傷害他人。

自觉"见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话"只是一句比较粗造的形容詞句,不足以完全表達這行為的全意。這是一種聆聽的藝術,看似把自己缩的小小的但其實已在对方的心里放的大大了。

阿祥 said...

最怕遇到人不人鬼不鬼的。

凡奇 Frankie said...

CacA*yEw*,
对,通常第一次见面我会先聆听观察。但这并不是最好的方法,因为往往会被人误以为高傲。大家一起来学吧!

火鳥,
其实在我写这篇之前,想了也找了字典,为的就是找到一个比较合适的名句来表达。但就是找不到。有想过,
见风使帆
见貌辨色
但都不贴切,只好用上“见人说人话,见鬼说鬼话”了。

阿祥,
那是狐仙吗?销魂极了!

夏娃 said...

其实现在的社会很搞笑得,不够圆滑别人说你蠢,太过圆滑别人说你是两头蛇,墙头草。

夏娃觉得最好的方法就是装作什么也不知道,明哲保身,XD

seasonc said...

我覺得這是做sales的必練功夫.

凡奇 Frankie said...

夏娃,
哇,这一招更厉害。小弟甘拜下风。哈哈。

seasonc,
做sales不只要练,还要炉火纯青才能。

.亮 said...

呵呵,我有一篇相关的发表,见人见鬼

凡奇 Frankie said...

.亮,
你的连接好像放错了,可以再放一次吗?

.亮 said...

不好意思,这里才对

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